You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Randomize
