My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
