I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize