and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
I think weed is turning my hair brown
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
Randomize