Jerry, you need to find god
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize
