2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize