If i could tip my vagina, i would.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
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