i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
Randomize
