why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
Randomize
