Your mouth is God's brothel.
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
Randomize