I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
Randomize
