Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
Randomize