So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
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