mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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