Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize