yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
