his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
Randomize