coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
Randomize
