So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
Randomize