the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
You might have been able to redeem yourself had you not referred to grandma as "this bitch".
That explains the hand print on my face. That old lady knows how to throw a punch.
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Randomize
