how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
Last time i carry you out of a forest
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
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