Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
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