So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
Randomize
