You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
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