I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
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