No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
Randomize
