If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Randomize