Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
