3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
So vagazzling was a success
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
Randomize