If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize
