Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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