this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
Also. After puking outside of the bar last night, some guy (who saw me puking) said I looked like Jennifer Lawrence, called me J Law, got my number and is now texting me. Who knew puking and rallying would do me any good
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
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