that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
My dad just said "fuck circus"
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
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