So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
