So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
You tend to look at life differently when you wake up to nutella vomit all over your room with no recollection of how it got there
You know how to spell recollection?
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
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