my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
Randomize
