RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
I fill condoms, not promises.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
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