You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Randomize
