I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
