oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
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