Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
Randomize
