I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
