Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Randomize