tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize