TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
