physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
Randomize
