butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
Randomize