I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Randomize
