i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
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