He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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