Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
Randomize