NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Randomize
